Smelly

Did I ever mention the time that I was coming down my stairs and I was greeted with a funk that was so incredibly bad, I seriously thought someone had tossed garbage at the bottom of the stairs.

It was eye watering.

And there was no garbage. I couldn't figure it out. I went outside, breathed in some fresh air, came back in, same bad smell. I couldn't pin point it exactly.

It faded. But the next day it was back and this went on for a few days, before I realized it was my son's shoes. My thirteen year old, odorous son, who does his own laundry.

Had no socks. Bare feet + Van's Sneakers = Garbage Smell. Who knew.

I had a personal parent/teacher conference today regarding my son. One of the various topics we discussed was his feet. That and the pig-pen type smell that is following him around these days. I don't quite get it because I make him shower.

Well, really he goes into the bathroom. The shower runs. He comes out sort of wet. Yet he still smells. His clothing smells, his hair is greasy and now kids are asking to be moved away from him.

My boy.

Thankfully, the rest of the conference talked about other more positive things.

But like stink, it lingered for the rest of the day with me.

So tonight, I took him to a local department store. I made him try on new sneakers, clean sneakers. He found a pair that fit (size TWELVE mind you, he was cramming his bare feet into size tens and swearing to me it was fine. FINE.), I took him over to men's clothing and picked out a brand new, stink free zip up hoodie (thanks Nike for being do darn expensive).

Then we went home and I made him wash all the laundry he had gathered up from around his room.

I might have sprayed some Lysol in there too. And I made him swear he would shower and use shampoo.

"But there is no shampoo."

"What?"

"There is no shampoo in the bathroom."

~cue the crickets~

"Son, I assure you, there is shampoo, it's on the shower caddy."

"It is?"

"Yes."

"Oh."

"So you'll shower and use the shampoo right?"

"Right."

"Excellent"

Except as it turned out, he forgot to shower. So he went to school, Thursday morning, in new sneakers, new sweatshirt, clean clothes and still dirty .... why????