Tuesday, January 24, 2012

So I Have To Tell You ....

I made a couple of phone calls today.  One was to your doctor and the other was to the Specialist that you are trying to get an appointment with.

The Specialist required two three phone calls.    I researched the Specialist through the hospital's directory and saw that he specializes in Pain Medicine.  This is good.  Because it is absolutely killing me to see you in so much pain, to see you so uncomfortable.  I hate it.

Anyway ...

After sitting through what seemed like a loop of pressing buttons on the telephone (I could have done the whole speak thing, but who wants to say something into the phone like a retard with no dialog, NOT ME.) I got through finally, and had a lovely chat with a perky girl, who informed me that I needed to call the Insurance Office to get you a "red card".  She then explained how its a separate plastic card, that is red (which duh), I sort of jumped in and said I was familiar with that.  (you know, because our oldest has a "blue card" for her hospital).  We will get it in the mail in a week or so.  Note to self:  Keep an eye out for a blue card red card. Details.  Ha.  Then

~Repeat~ to "I got through FINALLY" AND this time I had a lovely chat to find out, that I should have your Doctor send over the files to be reviewed by the Specialist (here is where I dutifully wrote down the fax number) for them to send your file over to be reviewed.  Oh by the way, the Specialist you want to see ... currently has a full practice.  But he has two Associates and he will figure out which one of them is best suited to work with you.  She also asked that the cover page include "For Specialists Review" on it so it would be clear what was needed.  (remember this tidbit for later)

Great ~insertsarcasmhere~

Now, I am hoping that once YOUR doctor hears this bit of news and having studied under him and all that jazz, the whole thing will end with you being in the Specialists practice.  Because you really need to see the absolute best.  I firmly believe that anything less is going to waste our time.  And we with never ending back pain there isn't time to waste and I get that.  So let us cross our fingers on that one.  Heck yeah.

My next phone call was a daunting task.  Dealing with your Doctor's Office sucks. Well you know that, its torture.  I come up with a plan of attack.  Then go through YET ANOTHER round of musical telephone keys only to hear the message, that the office closed for another 35 minutes.  Wah?

I don't have time for this people!

I call back and use my super sleuth phone skillz.  Instead of pressing the key for the office, I try the Injection Surgery Center instead.  SUCCESS.  I get a live person, I get a friendly voice and I had another lovely chat (Which, what are the odds of two lovely chats in this chaos of trying to get stuff done? It's almost like it was going too easy.  Could it be this easy?) and as the woman is patiently asking me how Urgent it is to speak to your doctor.  The conversation sort of went like this:

Me:  Hi, this is Mig (btw - it is pronounced Midge ... as in I'm short ... as in I'm just about the shortest one in the house these days, sans for a five year old) and I'd like to leave a voice mail message for the doctor.

Lovely Chat Lady:  Oh I'm sorry he doesn't have Voice Mail but I can get a message to him if its an Emergency, otherwise they are in a meeting in the Office until 1:00 PM.

Me:  ~agonizing over whether this is an emergency or not~  I was going to say that it is an Emergency ... but really it isn't. ~more agonizing because it really ISNT an emergency~  Yes, I guess it is.  Well, no. 

Lovely Chat Lady:  Why don't you tell me what is going on, maybe I can help you.

Me:  ~going from agonizing to uber professional wife~ Hi There, my name is Mig Pleading and I need to get some medical tests that were done here and notes from the Doctor to be faxed to a Specialists Office. 

Lovely Chat Lady:  Mig? It's Angel Lady!!  HOW ARE YOU?

Me:  Angel Lady?  I AM SO RELIEVED ITS YOU!  You work at the doctor's office?

Lovely Chat Lady:  YES.  And I am going to help you, don't you worry, this WILL GET DONE and as quick as possible.

Me:  Thank-you-Thank-you-Thank-you.  I will follow up with the Specialist and we can go from there.  Can you let the doctor know what is going on also?

Angel Lady:  Yes I will take care of it.  Don't worry.  I know what this is like and I can help you get it through.

Angel Lady.  This is one of those "never-in-a-million-years" scenarios.  I know this lovely lady from the Summer Concert Series, the one that performs as a duet and sings beautifully.  The one that I gave the honor of the Opening Evening of it.  (I felt so bad for her, the past two years that they were set to performed it RAINED and we don't do rain dates.)  Which she had the most lovely evening and played well into the night.  HER.  She answered the phone.  I, also, work with her husband at my night job so while we aren't friends, we have lots in common and there she is, on the other end of the phone.

It was meant to be.

I snapped out of the glory, you know ... so I could  .... YET AGAIN make my way through the phone system, course by this time I'm a pro at it.  I don't have to wait and hear the options.  I just press the right # at the right time.  I have a lovely chat again so I can tell the Specialists Office that the paperwork is coming and to keep an eye out for it.  She then explained that their office would call back and set up the appointment.  I thanked her.

I hung up sat back and thought .....  Angel Lady.  Unbelievable.  I look down at my notes and I see the reminder that  I wrote to myself ... it reads ...  "make sure cover sheet on the Fax reads For Specialists Review"