Monday, June 30, 2008

Flattery When You Least Expect It

I was in the Post Office today. Yes, THE POST OFFICE. That scary place that sometimes has freaking weird people working the counter selling you stamps and asking you odd questions about what you are sending.

Well not odd, in light of that whole anthrax thing. Heh.

So I'm waiting in line and this postal guy is reading some paperwork or something, he glances up at me.

"Next" he says.

I move up. I put down this book I'm sending to California. He looks at me and says ~

"There something different about you."

I shrug and stare blankly.

"Did you cut your hair?"

I nod, no.

"You look ... lighter. Did you loose weight, maybe?"

At this point I almost feel bad for the guy. He should have quit at the cut my hair route. Because I know him from years of selling crappe on ebay I let him off the hook.

"I've lost some of the baby weight I gained."

He breaks out into this big grin. "I knew it!". "That's right, you've come in with her, how old is she."

"Almost two."

The rest was uneventful. But I have to tell you, I have no desire to eat ANYTHING now. I figure if the post office guy noticed, I MUST be making some sort of progress here.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

A WTF Message

We went out to dinner tonight. We left at 4:30 PM. My neighbor called at 4:35 PM and left the following message:

"Hi, this is Mrs. WidowedNextDoorNeighbor, the one who, last year, said she would merely trim our bushes that were hanging on her garage, but had them hacked down to little nubs.

I am calling because there is an issue on my back property line and it needs to be addressed IMMEDIATELY. Please call me back at 555-555-5555."

I went out to our shared property line to see if her plan is to hack the one remaining bush left or if there is some other "issue". What I saw was lots of creeping vines. Bittersweet vines I believe is what they are.

Since they no longer have bushes to climb up on, they are starting to take over the back of her garage.

Hardly a priority for me. I guess I'll be dodging her for awhile.

Saturday, June 28, 2008


I had to attend a wake last night. Well let me step back a second here. I didn't "have" to attend but I did feel obligated to go.

The Vice-President of the Company had his mom die this past week. I have heard many stories of this woman and while I never met her I could just imagine what she was like and what it was like for him growing up with her.

I also heard about her failing health and even though I'm not someone he confides in, he did express some frustration over the past several weeks about inadequate health care that she had been receiving.

He came into work the next day to tie up some loose ends and get the heck outta there, I don't know that I could have done that in his situation. I spent the rest of the week answering questions from various colleagues about funeral arrangements.

Everyone from our office went (read: five of us) and after eight years of knowing him and working for him, I just couldn't live with the guilt of not going even though several people told me I wasn't obligated.

Anyway, my point (and I do have one, bare with me). I rode with my Boss and his Wife. For those of you who have followed me through two previous blogs to this blog know that I dodge this man who seems to figure out where I am writing. (alright due to my own stupidity SHUT UP)

It was weird taking the long ride to the funeral home with both of them. Every once in a while I think about the post that my Boss went over with me in painful detail. The one where I wrote that his wife should kick him in the head.

I cringe every time I think of it. Yes I was mad. And yes sometimes I feel justified in what I wrote. But riding in the car with the two of them, entertaining me with stories and just sharing good will with me ...

Well ... lets just say ... I really feel like I am an idiot sometimes.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Why I Will Never Be Popular

Planning is already in the works for the 4th of July. My man and his band are going to perform in a parade. It's all very exciting. This construction company is lending their flatbed truck, generator and they are going full tilt decorating it in a patriotic theme.

I just stopped in at band practice (read: in the garage) to get the skinny on the whole thing. Not surprising is the fact that they have FEW details.

I am a detail person. Not knowing the details is STRESSFUL to me. I did some research on line trying to see if there is a map of the parade route, or where the FUCK to park. I need to worry well in advance about this stuff.

Yes it is great fun to be me.

My daughter wants to be a true groupie and follow the band so she can dance and sing as she goes along. I was thinking that would be a good idea and I'd do the same (minus the dancing and singing; plus a baby and carriage).

The drummer? The one whose real estates office is sponsoring this whole thing? Nixed that idea. His real estate people will be wearing their real estate themed shirts following the band as they plan, handing out real estate logo balloons and candy.

He did offer to let me and the kids set up camp in his office's parking lot, which is in the parade route (I think). So that's a plus. Parking - check. Location to sit and watch parade - check.

I'm feeling better about it than I was a couple hours ago. Heck I'm feeling better about than I did a few days ago even.

For the band, they have two gigs in one day. Parade at 9:30 AM and 4th of July party at the bassist's sister house. The bassist? She's a great gal and she just put me right on the spot during my quick visit to get details.

"You are coming to my sister's party right?" (insert piercing stare here)

"Huh?" (me pretending like I have no clue what the heck she is talking about while considering pinching my own child as a distraction)

"My sister's party is right after the parade, you and the kids HAVE to come, it's on the beach, there will be a ton of food and everyone will LOVE to see the bahbee!"

"Oh well that sounds like fun (lies all lies), I plan on packing us all up for the day and traveling around with you guys anyway, WE WILL SO BE THERE"

What is my problem? Why can I not just look at this as a fun day out for us all. Why do I have look at it from the stress point of view? (by stress I mean planning drinks, snacks, clothing changes and how nap time will happen as we do all this) 4th of July last year we were invited to two parties, we went to neither of them. I took the kids to the mall, where it was totally dead and I loved every minute of it.

Every 4th of July doesn't have to be that. dull. This one should be fun. I mean who cares that it will probably be a balmy 90 degrees. We get to see a popular parade that my man and his BAND are playing in and then FREE FOOD and swimming at a beach afterwards. I know the baby will be only as good as my attitude is.

So I better find a good attitude or I am fucked!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Is It Wrong?

To take Cherry Flavored Children's NyQuil? There is an adult dosage noted on the package. So I went for it. I don't want to spend yet another night, hacking instead of sleeping.

Ok, I refuse to discuss coughing anymore. It is hereby banished from this post. (anyways)

I have nothing but a boring week ahead of me. The usual bootcamp, a couple night meetings, haircuts for the kids, a therapy appointment and a possible wisdom tooth extraction on Friday (not mine, thankfully, I'm the DD).

About the most exciting thing I've got happening is my plan to put together a "get well" package for my sister-in-law. I don't know if I've mentioned her here, like AT ALL. But she scares me. She is always one step away from total insanity. Her past history is being a drug addict, stripper and pathological liar. She, at one time, was incredibly beautiful and reminded me of Marilyn Monroe. These days the pictures I see, she looks like she's fifty (her and I have a birthday one day apart and were born in the same year).

She's convinced my man's mother that she's a recovering drug addict and that she's clean she's just got a whole host of medical ailments now. She's been hospitalized with a serious lung infection. She lives in Florida we live here, far away.

My man's mother has emailed us with her hospital room phone number at least three times now. I guess she has been asking about her brother. His mom said we could send any cards to her and she'd take them over to her. She will be in the hospital for a while.

What the heck do I put in this "care" package. I just asked if she reads? Neither one of us know for sure. Should I send some clean needles? A fresh pipe? Bake brownies? Find a t-shirt that will look good on her skeleton frame? What would cheer her up? Make her feel better?

I've got nothing to work with and I'm hoping Hallmark has a card that will work for me ... something like ... sorry to hear you are incredibly ill, stop doing drugs.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

As The Baby Screams

You can gauge a good day with the little one by how hard it is for her to get to sleep at bedtime. Clearly she isn't ready for bed. Although when I put her there she was game.

Now, not-so-much. She is crying for Ma-Ma. I am not about to give in. I need a break. I need some me time. That time is now.

Her dad might rescue her.


We had an incident earlier this week. A remote was thrown at a door that is 90% individual panes of glass. You'll never guess what happened.

And you'd be right. 100-year old glass doesn't break nicely. It falls into shards. Oh there was ALOT of apologizing for it. I do realize foolishness happens (it also doesn't hurt for it to happen when your friend is sleeping over and Mom doesn't want to make a scene)

It got taped up today and now will forever be cardboard. Oh it will go on that to-do list but it is already a mile long and probably the day we want to sell it, it'll move up.

Until then? Cardboard with blue painters tape. If I could of gotten all the glass out of the frame ... it would have been a cat door but no such luck.

One of the shards?

Ended up in my foot. I dug it out today. It had healed over but was a painful spot so I knew there had to be something there. Nothing says FUN like digging in the pad of your foot with a safety pin. Whooooie!

As an additional bonus, pollen is rampant here. I don't think I could be more allergic. The obnoxiously dry hacking cough I am experiencing is incredibly embarrassing and fucking annoying.

Embarrassing because it happens at the worst times, like when I am at the library paying over-due fines. Eyes beam red, throat tightens until I can't hold the cough in anymore, not a single stick of gum or hard candy in my bag. People looking at me like my lung might come up any second. The pointing out of the bubbler.

Fucking annoying because once it gets going it ... just ... doesn't .... stop. I can drink all the water I want but until that tickle has passed, I'm hacking and hacking and hacking. Repeat.

I went to the drugstore today and picked up five key things. None of which was cough medicine. THE WHOLE REASON WHY I WENT. I didn't cough once while I was there, riding to it or back.

Figures. I'm using throat spray and I managed to scrounge up some allergy medicine.

Hopefully it all will pass. Cuz you know ....

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Middle Class

The weirdest conversation happen in the car. I'm not sure why facing forward in a small environment takes down walls but it does ...

For teenagers,

I was taking my 8th grader over to her best friend's house for the "Anti-Semi Formal Dance" party. (I do believe the name speaks for itself) I was giving another friend a ride to the part also. Here is a snippet of the conflab.

Scene - Driving by a mobile-home park.

Friend: Those people are dirt poor.
Daughter: They sure are.
Friend: We aren't THAT poor.
Friend: But we are poor.
Daughter: Mom? We are Middle Class right?
(crickets chirp)
Daughter: Mom?

Ok so I did answer that we are Middle Class. I didn't leave her hanging. But in my head I'm can't even fathom why they would be having that discussion.

Why do kids not come with manuals? I seem to have forgotten everything about being a teenager, yet I remember it as if it were yesterday.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Like A Tooth Brush In The Gutter

Why the toothbrushes all ended up on the deck and one in the gutter is BEYOND ME. I'll just say the baby doesn't listen and leave it at that.


So a friend of mine lent me this book which she loved and she swore up and down that I would love it to. (that alone should have been a red flag) Two pages into it I wasn't impressed but I gave it until page 62 before I called it quits. I had a plan to just LIE when my friend asked what I thought of the book but when the moment arrived, I just said how much IT SUCKED.

I'm so tactful sometimes.

She took it well and we had a good laugh about how what one person loves another person cannot stand it so bad that they want to rip out all the pages and burn them. Not that I feel that way of course. I redeemed myself by mentioning to her how I FINALLY went into the used bookstore that is just three houses down from me. It's been there for four or five years now and I had yet to set foot in the place.

It was alright. I bought a few books but I absolutely loathe that they are stamped on the first page with the name and address of the establishment. How can it be mine if it's marked as someone else's. I'll get over it. I think.

This week so far has been a lot of getting over stuff. Like my 8th grader graduating to High School. I need to get over the fact that not only is she NOT a baby but anything that is her idea that might be perceived as going against her image, will become all my fault and arguing the point of how it was her idea ... will be an effort in futility.

Teenagers. (if you what I'm saying there, congratulations!)

Yesterday I worked my normal 8 hour shift and got a phone call near the end of the day about last night's critical meeting and could I have everything turned in by Monday. Normally that would be fine but having this person call me and CONFIRM it, makes me not want to get it done. As a matter of fact, it makes me feel like I want to procrastinate. Which is never a good thing. What is wrong with me?

Don't answer that.

Tonight, I've got the Controversial Committee Meeting. (insert eye roll here) At the risk of sounding like a broken record .... I ....... don't ....... want .... to .... GO. Thankfully my daughter needs a ride at 8:30 so I can only provide (or donate) an hour of my time tonight.


Friday night I am having bookclub at my house. Sadly supercool JennyJ won't be there. But all of you are invited. We are reading Heart Shaped Box by Joe Hill. (Yes, I choose a weird and creepy book). She knows I'm bitter about her being unable to attend but that I am trying to be nice because, you know, she has a life and kids and the right to go off and do fun stuff. Tomorrow night I will be cleaning my house like a madwoman. Between the kids missing the toilet (but hitting the carpet dead on) and the dog shedding, I might just loose my mind people.

I'll get through it. I always do.

On a good note, at the mere idea of seeing an orthopedist, my foot? Is recovering. Oh it still hurts and annoys me that I can't run BUT it hurts much much LESS.

Way to save on the $15 co-pay eh?

Monday, June 16, 2008

Six Random Things About Me

For my faithful commenter Sassy. Thanks for tagging me for this meme.

1. I have to park on the right side of our driveway. Otherwise, it ruins my whole day (trust me!)

2. I cannot stand hand prints on the bathroom mirror. And guess what is ALWAYS on my bathroom mirror. (sometimes seconds after I clean it)

3. I collect bookmarks.

4. I am not a fan of tomatoes. This whole salmonella thing? Is awesome, I no longer have to say hold the tomatoes. They are held automatically.

5. I do not like Brit Hume. (if you don't know who that is? I like you even more now)

6. Basements creep me out.

What It Isn't

Friday's physical was uneventful. There will be no MRI on my neck due to my hands deciding that they will no longer fall asleep in the middle of the night. Oh AND I don't have any neck pain either. Apparently MRI's are hugely expensive and REAL pain is needed to justify them.

So whatever.

There was much discussion about my leg though. It was thought, that perhaps I had a hairline fracture and that might be the cause of the constant nagging pain EVERYTIME I MOVE. The tendon shown in the above picture is the tendon I think I've injured.

Now waiting rooms are always fun. You have lots and lots of time to sneak glances at people and wonder about their situation and what procedure they are having done. Some check in and go right through. Others (like me) check in and wait.

And wait.

And wait.

And wait.

Finally called into review insurance information and then sent down to x-ray. Where (you guessed it) there is yet another waiting room. So THAT'S where everyone went. There were a few that I took note of.

The Harley Dude with the raspy voice. I overheard he had come back from being there earlier because the doc wanted an x-ray of this throat? Weird.

The nicely dressed woman who was white as a ghost had potentially broken both her arms in a fall off a curb. The technician told her husband he could stay in the waiting area so he told me her story. Then we ALL heard her wailing and off he went. Why when you have broken something do they make you stretch it all out in a painful way without giving any sort of drugs is just cruel.

Then there was the weird lady and her sidekick. Why is there always one? She heard the whole situation with the nicely dressed woman and was asking me questions. Like I knew anything more than what we both heard. I think it was just a lead-in to ask me what was wrong. So, like an idiot, I explained.

"So you did it exercising theeeeen?"

"I think so"

"Well it looks swollen"

"It doesn't look like anything but my leg, I have no idea what is wrong with it."

"Well can yaaaa walk?"

"Um, yes."

"Well I hurt myyyyy knee and its like the cartilage is all gone and I can hear it rubbing when I walk."

Alright, TMI. Thankfully she went on to talk to her sidekick and I could overhear her saying how she wouldn't be able to exercise anymore because of heeeer knee. Like she even exercised at all. Just sayin.

I did my x-ray next and left. They did a "wet read" which meant the doctor got the results immeidately.

So a little while later I got the call. It's not broken. Excellent.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

The Wind Beneath My Wings

Dear Dad,

It would be years before I would understand you. Many years. Like a never-ending story, I only get you a chapter at a time. The first I remember is a younger you, always yelling. Wanting to be heard, expressing your frustration. Like many young couples raising two children (one with mental health issues) there was alot to be heard on. To this day, I can imitate your "Italian salute" and accompanying Italian swear words. You'd be so proud.

When I was a teenager I remember our endless sessions going around and around about whatever. Why you let me tell you, again and again to go "suck and egg" I have no idea. I now fondly can appreciate your explanation of how the color black (my favorite color to this day) is really the absence of color. You were there for my High School and Business School Graduations, I hope that when you saw me through those milestones you were proud.

One of my fondest memories of you was your willingness to talk to Mom about my moving out and into my own place. I can only imagine how hard it was for you to come out and ask me if I had "protection" when you found out the truth, that I was moving in with a guy and to share your understanding that the heart knows what it wants, when it wants it.

However, it wouldn't be until years later that I would appreciate your math abilities and your interest in astronomy. I miss standing out in the darkest, coldest night looking at craters on the moon or seeing a bright star in the heavens through that expensive lens. I now miss all those times you were showing the phenomenal pictures of black holes and the birth of stars. I don't think your telescope even comes out anymore because there are lights everywhere.

It is only within the last several years that I have really come to understand that time on earth is a limited thing. And as I watch you age and I enjoy your company more and more, I am sad that our get-together's are so few and far between. I wish I could see you every day. I wish that you could share in our lives and see your grandchildren more frequent.

I never know what the next Chapter of you will be but I am going to enjoy each and every one of them. You are interesting. You have been there for me for my entire life.

I love you dad.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

A Moment Of Silence

For Baxter, the black lab that had a sometimes scary bark but was always a sweet loving dog. You ate many hot dogs and did your share of squirrel chasing and now, may you rest in peace.


Today wasn't a day of good news, for sure. But sometimes that is just how days go. It's been a challenging week at work (don't worry, no yelling) with myself in the limelight. Making sure there is compliance and trying to put policies in place that will protect the company going forward.

I don't want to sell myself short ... but having that kind of responsibility, is fucking HUGE and I hope no one catches on to the fact that I'm really a twelve year old disguised as a responsible adult.


I got a break from the baby this evening. Escaped for a haircut and highlight. I had a long discussion with my stylist about those kinky gray hairs that keep breaking rank and appearing EVERYWHERE on my head. She offered no hope. For the moment this works but at some point, I'll be dying my whole head because I don't ever want to look like a Nana. Let alone Nana with an afro.


Tommorrow I've got my yearly physical. I love being a pin cushion, oh and I can't wait to get on the scale. NOT!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Screaming In My Head

Has anyone seen my liquid eyeliner? Seriously? I keep all my daily items in one single, solitary spot. I am not messy. I am methodical. The baby did not take it. There have been no other children in my room (that I know of). Yet it is missing.

I searched downstairs for it. I checked the trash, which is gross and I would have remembered if I tossed it. Then I inspected my oldest's eyes. And basked in their youthful glow. To which she rolled them and said MOM, I haven't seen your eyeliner.


I found a replacement and moved on. There is no dwelling when time is limited in the early AM hours. I should mention here that I am anxiously waiting for the end of the school year. It's a landmark year for my oldest. The eighth grade graduate.

There was no further talk of who loves who more. Although I did ask my son his thoughts on the matter. Did he think I loved him more? His answer was to ask me "What time of the day is it?" I have no idea what he meant (ok, well maybe I do. Like I yell more, at him, at the end of the day, lalalalala) but just to be clear... I gave him the I love all three children equally speech. Bases covered.

Today my oldest was invited to go to the MALL with her best friend. There was to be shopping for the upcoming 8th grade Award Ceremony. So, wanting to express some "extra" love on her I slipped her a $20 so she could get herself some music or books. I had to stop and ask myself if that's the teenage language for love. Because I got a very sweet hug for it.

She left riding with her friend's Aunt in a white Chrysler Convertible. I may have been a little jealous. Watching her grow up is not easy on me. She paves the way for her brother and sister and, while I know she feels that weight on her (along with my harping on her to be polite, learn willingly and get good grades) she has done nothing but make me proud.


It was all the usual nutty stuff this afternoon. Trying to juggle a toddler literally wrecking my house while I sort mail and make dinner. I think I might have lost it a little when she was stuffing Life Cereal in the heating grate. Oh and perhaps when she dug up my green bean plants, too.

I took her and the dog for a walk to get some fresh air (and maybe restrain her for a while) and she lugged her blanket along too. Why I don't remember how much my leg hurts until I do these things is beyond me.

But the kicker? Still can't find that eyeliner.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

You Love Him More ...

Four words I knew would be coming. Four words that I wasn't sure when they would be said but I figured it was inevitable.

Turns out today was my day.

As I rode with my daughter to the grocery store, just hours ago, we had the following conversation ~

Her: Does this get me out of carrying the groceries in the house?
Me: Is that the only reason why you wanted to come with me?
Her: Yes.
Me: Well (insert brothers name here) usually does it anyway, so it is not like you are actually getting out of anything.
Her: Oh I know, he's your chore boy. Can I help you with anything? (she says this mocking her brother)
Me: I always ask you BOTH to help. He responds. You don't.
Her: I know, I know. I'm lazy. I'm the teenager.
Me: (laughs) That's right.
Her: He will do whatever you ask, when you ask it. Not me.
Me: Well you are a different person.
Her: Yes, I am and you love him more.


Me: What?
Her: You heard me, you love him more.
Me: I don't think so.
Her: You do.
Me: No, I love your DAD more. Dad first, children second. He will be the one left when you all grow up and leave me.
Her: (shrugs)
Me: It doesn't matter what I say here, you aren't going to believe me but I love all three of you equally. You need to remember that each of you are different.
Her: You are right Mom, I'm not going to believe you.
Me: I felt the same way about my brother and my parents. They always did more for him, than me.
Her: Oh really?
Me: YES and to this day, I would say they loved him more.
Her: (silent)

Alright so I s~t~r~e~t~c~h~e~d the truth a bit. I don't really believe that about my brother. But when I was her age, I totally did. Probably because I was the one getting into trouble. I was the one shoplifting and lying about where I was and who I was with. My brother? Has mental issues and ... well ... lets just say it's taken me ... years (maybe even until now) to realize that I was a different kid (a kid that lived in the real world, not in my head). They needed to focus on him and get him treatment for his issues.

While I grew cobwebs sitting in the recliner waiting to not be grounded and plotting my escape. Two different upbringings but really? It's all the same.

Monday, June 9, 2008

It's Hard To Admit ...

I'm weak. Oh, you know, we ALL are weak in some regard. But I have a difficult time admitting it. I can skirt the issue. I can give you a great big smile. I can But admit it? Weakness? Does. Not. Come. Easy.

So to say I was humbled last week, is an understatement. Hurting my leg, right above my ankle, having no idea what is wrong with it, being unable to walk normal, in any sense of the word.


Trying to get back to bootcamp, in front of 20+ participants, making like I can run (and lap many of them) and do jumping jacks, just not possible.

This morning? I skipped class. The instructor? He knows 100% what is going on. I don't have to tell him. He gets it.

He thinks I'm foolish. He thinks I'm being irrational. He thinks modify, modify, modify. He thinks I need to just come to class and not dwell.

I'm not one for doing what other people would do. And throw in an inability to push everyone in class to the max because I'm the fastest and I'm able to do all of it and not get winded, and I just don't want to go.

Yeah, yeah. I know what you all are thinking ... (that BEEOTCH, shut up!) who cares right?


Sunday, June 8, 2008

Just Because

Just because I can, here are the top five things annoying me today ~

1. 95+ degree temperatures and listening to my neighbors in their pool!
2. Due to a gigantic rate hike in electricity it will take living in the Mohabi for me to bring out the A/Cs for our living space, so fans? Suck.
3. I need a haircut, can you say sweaty bangs stuck to my forehead boys and girls?
4. My foot? STILL HURTS.
5. Forgetting I didn't put on ANY make-up this morning and then going out to the hardware store and dinner, virtually nakkid.

Also, just because I can, here are the top five things I am loving today ~

1. A/C in our bedroom! (Hey, we don't work 40+ hour weeks to sweat like pigs)
2. Hugs and kisses from the Baaybeee.
3. Season III of the canceled HBO show, Deadwood.
4. Getting a very important set of minutes done for Tuesday night's meeting.
5. My shorts? Are all too big!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

I'll Have The Usual ...

Here it is Thursday, AGAIN. What is up with the weeks flying by at lightening speed (like the evenings from 5-10), yet still having their grinding halt for speed bump moments (like work at 2 PM). My head spins one minute and I can hear crickets chirping ... or is manitis?

I've had my moments this week of wanting to choke my teenager. For example, pulling into the parking lot of the orthodonist the other day and hearing how her brother ... and I quote ... "gets all the new stuff." Her ability to dumbfound me is amazing and even worse, I find myself being sucked in by replying. Why, oh why, do I not just laugh it off.

Instead I engage her and want specific examples, yet I can come up with none to prove to her that it really is HER that gets all the new stuff ....

Like a newly painted bedroom (oh SHUT UP, I know it's not even close to being done yet but the thought DOES count)
New furniture
New clothes
New DS games
New DVDs
New CD's
New Songs for her
New Ipod

I think in her mind it's only new for one day and then ... its older than dirt. I do realize there is no arguing with the teen psyche' but I'd like to try.

Even if it makes me insane OR makes me not want to paint EVER again. Heh.

The last two days I've spent with my new friend Mr. Icepack. I seem to have pulled a muscle on the outside of my calf. I don't know HOW and I'm not sure exactly when. I can tell you that by the end of class YESTERDAY I could hardly walk. Which is fun, you know as you are trying not to grimace or make like your leg KILLS. So you casually put on your shoes and then scream and bite your shirt as you drive home (thankfully the leg I hurt is not the accelerator pedal).

I followed the whole RICE theme. And no, we aren't talking Chinese Food here. We are talking Rest, Ice, Compression and Elevation. Alright, I LIE. I can't rest.

My inability to ignore mess doesn't allow for resting of any sort. I would just drag my leg along and hop back and forth to get what I needed done. I wish my obsessive cleaning had a switch I could turn off sometimes. On the other hand, company can always stop by.

Work's been fun this week. The yeller has been over the top in the kindness department. I've been hanging out in my office (you know RESTING my bum leg) so my productivity has been through the roof this week. Sadly I can't visit here from there.

Not that it stops a certain VP from casually using my shredder and then lingering BEHIND ME. It's this scenario that I think brought down my second blog (it's shameful how dense I can be sometimes, isn't it?) It took me only a second or two to realize he was lingering so I turned and look up at him and saw him just STARING at my computer.

I was reading the NEWS. Oh, have I laughed about that over the past few days.

Enough about work. That Tabu topic.

There has been much excitement in my Library this week. I have added (because I finished painting it) the final bookcase and I bought (and put together) a bench seat. All of books now have a home. The area has become magnetic for me and my little piece of heaven. It has also brought home how SOMEONE NEEDS TO KILL ME IF I BUY ANY MORE BOOKS. I do not need any ... period. You will see what I mean, when I post pictures.

It's going to be 90 here this weekend. Or so I'm hearing on the weather reports. I am thinking of surprising the kids and taking them YARD SALING. Yes, I am that dorky. It's not that we need anything, it's more the point of buying USED stuff that I want to make to my teenager.

Is that wrong?

I don't think so either. We will see how it goes. It doesn't have to be this weekend, next weekend works too.

I will end here, with a wish to everyone for a Happy Friday.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Right, Wrong & The Mantis

I had made the suggestion to my mother, that as a "fun" Christmas gift to my son, he might be interested in growing a praying mantis. He was very interested. And also very patient because it was April when we finally opened the box and took out the order form, which brought us here.

The instructions tell you that once the egg arrives to fasten it to a stick. This can be done several ways. You may run a thread through the outer layer of the dcase and tie it to the stick, use white glue to attach the case and stick to your habitat. Place your habitate in a warm area. Now that's all well and good but I also ordered the wingless fruit flies. So our shipment consisted of four tubes. Two with this powder stuff that looked like instant potates, one with blue gushy stuff and fly larve AND (last but not least) the mantis egg (Note: A single mantis egg can hatch 100 babies, WTF!)

There is a label on the tube, it tells you to spray the egg, once attached in it's habitat with warm water, regularly. I have to say I was so BUSY with life that those four tubes were somewhat neglected. The first round of flies (it will yield 10 x 30 flies) croaked before I got them into the powdered stuff (which is their FOOD! Um hello, failing science 101 here).

This booklet, which is in Spanish AND French, does not give NEARLY enough instructions for 100 little insects to be born in this house. Just sayin'. We finally got the habitat all set up. My son went outside and found a suitable stick AND lots of grass. We used twisty ties to fasten the egg and I sprayed it with warm water. Less than 24 hours later ....

There was HATCHING. And panic. I had to read the next step ... all in a hurry. Hatching should take place in TWO WEEKS. (someone lied on that one, try ONE WEEK). Shortly after eggs hatch, it is important to separate the nymphs into jars so they don't eat each other (oh THATS NICE!) and add live insects to feed (I had no problem with that last step, in a week I had 60 plus flightless fruit flies.

Luckily I have a BABY, therefore I have baby food jars. My son and I scrambled around searching for elastic bands, pieces of cloth, more grass and twigs.

I'm pretty sure this is a horrible picture but we did manage to use a teeny tiny paintbrush to aid the little fellas into their individual jars. They were AWESOME to see. Climbing on the grass. Add the live food. Then we watched (think of watching a moving needle in a haystack, you see nothing because they BLEND).

There was more reading of the mantis manual. More like mantis BIBLE. If you do not have enough food or space, release the nymphs outside in garden areas to increase the likelihood of their survival. EXCELLENT.

Here's where my story goes wrong. There should have been this ...

Instead there was this ...

I'm not sure what the heck happened. The mantis bible has no "troubleshooting" guide. Each of the four, were found upside down with x's for eyes. I though maybe the cloth wasn't letting in enough air, so I caught a flying ant and watch the thing survive for four days. (I'm not into insect torture, really, I'm not) Now, my son wants to try again because those little baby's were "so cool". Me? Notsomuch.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Shocking, I know.

Alright, so it's Tuesday. What the heck happen to Monday? Ahhh I was recovering. Not from all the family goodness I posted Sunday but from JOLTS OF ELECTRICITY being shot through my hands with electrodes or something scientific like that.

I can take pain very well. Two of my three children were born with NO DRUGS whatsoever. Not by choice mind you. I was begging six ways to Sunday for any sort of drug that would ease the agony of a watermelon going through a two inch hole (HAHA). To no avail. "I'm sorry honey but you are going to have this baby SOON, it will be fine ~ pats arm~"

Anway, my point. It FUCKING hurt.

It was a test for carpal tunnel. Perhaps you've had it done too? If so let me know your thoughts on this but as the woman who administered the test was super nice about the whole thing and happened to mention I might find it annoying, she was WRONG, I wanted to punch her in the face.

It was beyond annoying.

Then the Neurologist came in. Because really the whole carpal (I just wrote crapal and it really is) tunnel thing is nerve related. As if the shock therapy wasn't enough, this guy did acupuncture with an electrode needle. I still, at this very moment, can't decide which sucked more.

The end result? I DO NOT HAVE CARPAL TUNNEL. Gee, I wish I knew that going into it, I'd of saved myself some serious aggrevation. It is possibly a pinched nerve in my neck, which I don't comprehend. See this whole thing started when my hands ... both hands ... would go to sleep at night (think pins and needles) and WAKE ME UP hurting. That, is not, normal. But my jolting muscles and nerves were within the correct ranges. So now, I get an MRI and maybe an answer.

Does my neck hurt? Nope.

I did get an audience with the Neurologist and while he was administering the whole needle test, I would throw out these nonchalent questions ...

Like oh did I happen to mention I get migraines? Could that be it?

Or, I asked if my vertigo might be somehow related. Yes, I AM that casual about it. And as he jabbed me, he answered all my questions and then asked some of his own. The whole thing ... took a lot longer than it should have ... and .... let's just say I got some interesting looks when the people who came in after me, were still sitting in the waiting room when I left.

So ... just to recap ... what I got out of the whole thing IS, my vertigo isn't anything major, just floaties in my ear canal and my migraines? I have to manage. And the jury is still out on the sleeping hands.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

One Week Ago Today

I can't believe how fast times goes by (ok duh!). This is a pictoral recap of our evening, one week ago today. My daughter had suggested we go out for dinner and I said, YES YES AND YES. I am all about not cooking. The baby asked for her seat once we arrived. Which is that a bad thing? That at 20 months she knows she should have her own chair when we dine out? On the way back we stopped at the local grocery store and paid entirely too much for two bundles of wood.

The childrend being forced to not use any sort of electronic device while we hung outside, made use of a bag of soccer related items that was given to me two days prior (the timing of that is unbelievable and at when it was given to me I thought, we will never us it)

There were cones and shirts and several soccer balls. My oldest set out all the cones and made a playing field. I should mention here we live on a postage stamp sized lot. It's all house. So said soccer field was on the small side. The baby tried on a shirt but they were too big.

Here she is dodging the camera. See her smiling. As I said let me take your picture she said "no".

Still trying to get a smile.

Here she watches her brother put on a soccer training ball. It's tethered to his leg. (I should point out here, it's the most exercise either of my oldest kids have had in my presence in what seems like FOREVER)

Action shot (my photography is so bad that the moving ball is not in the picture)

Still no smile for me.

Here's where I get in her face. You will SMILE for me.


Here is a husband sighting. They ARE rare. He's not too bad at fire building either.

Long shot.

I played a few rounds with the kids and got my shins smacked.

I've already posted this one but it's one of my favorites. I wish I had a sister.

Ok, we'll take one with her tongue hanging out.

This is her new "thing". Making it look like she has no lips. She gets us all to do it for her, like the fools that we are. Putty in her hands.

This is the baby in her sister's tree. We planted it when she was three and now, eleven years later, it blesses us with decidious goodness in the form of silver maple tree seeds. (anyone want some? I have three trash bins full and more to go). It does make for a good picture spot.

A boy and his shades.


As I sat by the fire, there was discussion on how this overgrown mess of a shrub needs to go. Not that they have any say, but there was objection.

Apparently, it's name is George Bush (I cannot make this stuff up people) and we cannot take it down. I did point out that this is an election year and since he's not running, it has been voted OUT.

Finally dessert! There was much burning of ...


After we all finally sat by the fire, each of us were given names. I can't remember mine. But the baby's was "little boss". My daughter's was "paeoti" and my son was "silent wind". Not be confused with "breaking wind". Which even at this very moment still cracks me up that I kept calling him that. It was appropriate. And that is all I've got.